


when he went, i went with him

by itstiredandy



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Tragedy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bokuaka - Freeform, Character Death, M/M, Sci-fi-ish, mentioned car crash, technically it is a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:49:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25886854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itstiredandy/pseuds/itstiredandy
Summary: When the love of Bokuto's life dies in a car crash, he is left to wallow and bitter in his own grief. However, his roommate, Konoha Akinori gives him a temporary bandaid in form of a interdimensional travelling tool, hoping it will help his friend heal. It happens to do just the opposite, and due to Bokuto's actions moving forward, their relationship is also damaged. So what does it take for him to move on?
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Bokuto Koutarou & Konoha Akinori
Comments: 5
Kudos: 17





	when he went, i went with him

**Author's Note:**

> this baby has been in the works for mONTHS but only bc im unmotivated af but ANYWAY
> 
> i had this whole idea that with would've come out at the end of my bokuaka weeks prompts after all the fluff and y'all would weep (hopefully) but shit happened and i only finished this now

**_State your name._ **

_ -(heavy sigh) Bokuto Koutarou. _

**_And the reason why you are here._ **

_ -You brought me here. (long pause) You caught me using illegal tech. _

**_What did you use it for?_ **

_ -I… It's complicated! _

  
  


Bokuto Koutarou would remember that phone call for the rest of his existence. 

And every part of his brain seemed to haven gotten stuck to the thought that it had had to be some sort of sick twisted prank because really, how could it be real? How could his light be snuffed out when he wasn't looking, the bulb shattered to leave him in an empty space, empty and cold where he could die and no one would know because no one would ever even think to  look for him there?

Comically and just to add more morbid absurdity to the situation, the sky had been raining down on him when Koutarou got the news and he had forgotten his umbrella at home. Soaked in water from head to toe, he picked up his phone right after stepping outside the building where  he worked. 

His screen had shown that the number calling was unknown.

But as he found out just a minute after, it was a hospital's line. He was listed as Keiji's emergency contact. They told him the ambulance arrived too late and that the man identified by the ID on his wallet as Akaashi Keiji had died before reaching an OR.

The doctor told him Keiji had been run over by a car. But Koutarou couldn't keep listening for too long, his mind began to dissociate and the more the doctor talked, the less he actually listened to the words being said and the worst the world felt on his shoulders because the absence was sat heavy on is chest, enough that the simple act breathing turned painful. 

There had been space between him and reality right then, as if he was being pulled away from it except his body wouldn’t move. And no matter where his eyes looked, nothing seemed quite what it was supposed to be anymore. The shape of the buildings didn't change but they suddenly felt off, which was true for every other object Koutarou could see. When familiar faces passed by him, they didn't look how he had remembered them. All of it screamed  **wrong** .

Everything around Koutarou began to seem wrong and it all blurred together like ingredients being mixed to create cement. A big giant block of cement - grey and hard and useless in a situation where it wasn't needed.

If he hadn't known the way back to his apartment by heart, Koutarou would've gotten lost trying to get back to it. The entire journey had been a haze in his mind. The next few days became a haze. Those turned into a continuous single experience of spending his hours in bed, refusing to eat, snapping at Konoha for trying to get him to say exactly what had happened when it was ridiculous to believe he could even muster the words out loud. The pain engulfed him whole, made it so everything else turned a mocking entity having fun at his expense, made it so he was the butt of a joke he never even got to hear because he had been too busy focusing on something else he had deemed as more important. Which meant that it had been his fault.

Of course, Konoha ended up finding out about it when Keiji's parents called. 

Koutarou refused to talk to them at all, he knew he would be sure to cry himself to death if he did. And did he have the right to cry, really? Could he when the couple had lost their son, as much as Koutarou himself felt like part of him had been ripped out, they must've felt it ten times over. 

Could he, Bokuto Koutarou, let tears fall because his heart that had been crushed, stepped on, demolished and smashed while knowing Keiji's would never even beat again?

  
  


**_What was exactly the tech you were using?_ **

_ -Some... thing that creates… dimensional holes or something? I don't really know. _

**_How did you even get your hands on it?_ **

_ -Fukurodani's security is crap. _

**_So you stole it?_ **

_ -Yeah, I did. _

  
  


Akaashi Keiji had been his open sky. A hopeful feeling you get when you look up at wide space, the excitement of knowing you can pull off any number of ridiculous amazing feats because you are that great. Koutarou's self esteem had never been on the lower end but Keiji had made it soar. 

So what now?

It had been a few weeks, Koutarou had lost his job and he just couldn't find one bone in his body to care. But then again, he had Konoha for that.

The banging he woke up to that morning had been his roommate's doing. He was only lucky because Koutarou had already been awake then. His sleep seemed like it was beginning to be cut short a little bit each new night he lived in a world without Akaashi Keiji.

Konoha went to his bed and pulled the sheet off. "Get up." 

"No."

"Get the fuck up right now."

"Why?"

"Because you cannot keep shielding yourself from everything like you're a little baby that never learned how to function." Konoha proceeded to hold the door open with his foot. "I need to show you something."

Koutarou eyed his friend with an arched eyebrow and pursed lips. Eventually, he clicked his tongue and dragged himself out of bed - making sure to pull the sheet along with him so he could cocoon himself with it.

In the living room, Koutarou saw it was dark out already, time passing him by so fast that it almost seemed like it didn't move at all. 

"Bokuto." Konoha walked towards him, grabbing his hands so he could place something in them. 

It was heavy - short and rounded but probably made out of some dense metal. Koutarou couldn't even begin to guess what it was for.

"What's this?"

"A jumper."

"Huh?"

"You heard me. You know the multiverse theory, right? Everyone should, at this point."

"I-" Koutarou sighed at the question, furrowing his eyebrows. "I do but-"

"Shush and let me finish -"

"But you asked me-!"

Konoha shot him a stare. A 'I'm well aware of that but now I need you to shut up' stare. It worked as intended.

"A jumper lets you travel between the different dimensions."

Koutarou tried to process. He blinked, once, twice and again, he opened and closed his mouth also more than just once, shaking his head.

"How-"

"Look, I couldn't explain the science of it to you if I tried, I just designed the thing, not created it." Konoha shot, sitting down. "But do you understand what I'm getting at?"

Koutarou followed suit. "Kinda? I'm… I'm not sure-"

"I am trying to give you a chance to see Akaashi again. It won't be your Akaashi and you can't really interact with him but… maybe just the knowledge that he's still out there in a way, will help you recover and move on." Konoha breathed in and then out with a huff, a hand on his temple as he leaned to the left with his elbow to fall on the couch. "Because honestly I'm sick of looking after your whiny ass. And you need to get your job back, or look for another one."

"Konoha… I…" He gripped the device in his hand, muscles tensing, as he looked down at it. 

Something rose up in his throat. His lips quivered, his eyes watered and a hiccup escaped, pain stabbing through his heart. Konoha remained silent as Koutarou's face was drenched in his own tears. He eventually started wiping them away but more came down like an overflowing cup that just keeps receiving more and more water as if there wasn't enough of it already. Koutarou got sick of it quickly, he'd always hated crying. Yet he couldn't make himself stop.

"But Bokuto-" Konoha leaned on his knees once the tears ran dry by themselves. "You gotta promise me you'll only use it once."

"Wait- why?"

"Because if you get to visit Akaashi's until the day you die you'll never really recover. You didn't get a chance to say goodbye before, I'm just giving you one."

"Oh. Okay." Koutarou nodded in response. "I... I promise.

"Good. And Bokuto?" He snapped his head back up. "Use it in the apartment, yeah?"

"Ye-Yeah."

  
  


**_How did you learn how to use it?_ **

_ -Trial and error. _

  
  


"Konoha?"

It was only a day later, after his friend had come home from work, when Koutarou was reminded that he had no idea of what he was doing with the jumper. __

"How do I work this thing?"

"Right!" Konoha hissed, setting his backpack on the floor. "I forgot to tell you. Hand it." Koutarou did, intensely watching as his friend began to explain. "First, simple enough, just turn it on. Second, you turn this thing-" Konoha held onto a circular button at the edge of the circumference, "to whatever number you choose. This device has twenty five, I think. You can't really see into the dimension you're choosing though. Third you put it on the floor and fourth, you push this button-" He pointed to it at the center of the device, "and just stand above it."

"Huh… That is simple." 

"Too simple. It's why it's out of circulation, a lot of people shouldn’t have one of these."

"... Right."

"You promised me, Bokuto." Konoha emphasized. "I'm trusting you. You know I'm your friend and I'm here for you but you need to be careful."

"I know!" Koutarou stared down at it, sliding his thumbs on the edges. "I know."

  
  


**_And how did you break into Fukurodani's_** **_vault?_**

_ -Well, like I said, it's not that great, I just got a uniform and a key card and I was there. _

**_Tell us again what you used it for._ **

_ -(deep sigh) I was just playing around, who wouldn't want to visit a different dimension?! _

  
  


The first Keiji he saw in a different dimension was very much like his Keiji, Koutarou thought. For starters, his appearance was about exactly the same. Black short hair, rounded long face, slender eyes and limbs, long fingers, long legs. He even dressed about the same - with glasses and all. So at first glance, there were no notable differences aside from the fact that this Keiji was still breathing with a heart still beating. But his life was wildly different.

Instead of a book editor, this Keiji was a bartender. Koutarou caught his first glimpse of him at the bar he worked at, a few blocks away from Koutarou's apartment, the place that was his in his own dimension. Keiji smiled at all the customers, even those who insisted on being loud and obnoxious, he cracked jokes and waited for laughs, he played tricks with the plastic bottles and cursed whenever they slipped from his grasp. It unsettled Koutarou but he stepped closer. 

He took a seat at the counter, eyeing the man as he worked. It had crossed his mind that eventually, Keiji would get to him, as a customer, ask what he would be having. He had been counting on it.

"Welcome," Keiji shot him a normal grin, "what can I get you?"

Koutarou cleared his throat before answering. "Just cold water."

"Really? You kinda look like you could use something stronger."

"I don't really drink."

"And you're at a bar?" Keiji arched both his eyebrows at him, shrugging as he walked away to grab the drink. "Water coming right up."

When he got back, Koutarou asked, "Why do you think I look like I need booze?"

"Can I be brutally honest with you?"

"... Sure."

"You have a dead stare right now. Like you're lost because something important to you has gone missing and you have no idea how to deal with it. And it kinda looks like you haven't slept in forever too, are you okay?"

Oh by gods, the cruel joke doesn't end, does it? Even in a different universe, Akaashi Keiji managed to read Bokuto Koutarou like he's the man's favorite book that he already knows every single line to. It was suffocating.

Koutarou grabbed his cup, downed the cold water in one go and put it down on the table. "How much was it?"

"Water's free."

"Alright then. Thanks."

And with that, Koutarou stomped out. He didn't stop until he reached the street of his apartment, where he could at least get in the alleyway next to it and pick the bags of garbage lying on the floor. 

What a goodbye that had been. In all fairness, it was close to impossible for Bokuto to keep his cool when he was bitter. Meeting a different Akaashi didn't give him closure, it just broke his heart all over again.

It was still better than wallowing in his own misery at home all day.

  
  


**_Were there any side effects?_ **

_ -What? No, nothing happened. _

**_Did the tech at any point malfunction?_ **

_ -No- Look, is this an interrogation or a questionnaire for product review? _

  
  


"Bokuto? Where's the jumper?"

"I broke it."

"HA?!"

Koutarou took a deep breath, meeting Konoha in their kitchen. "I- I don't really know how it happened, but when I came back, it just looked… sorta… destroyed."

"Ah fuck-" Konoha rubs the space between his eyebrows, head hung low. "I must've given you a prototype or something, sorry."

"It's fine."

"So where is it?"

"Well… it was all just bits and pieces so I put it in a plastic bag and took it to a trash can, two blocks away."

"Y-" Konoha sighed, squinting his eyes with a frown on his lips that dissolved into a sigh a few seconds later. "Ah well, that's not too bad, I guess. And how are you feeling?"

"I'm… dealing with it now, I guess." Koutarou shrugged. "It's not like the pain just went away."

"Yeah, yeah, no, I know." Konoha replied with a softer tone. "Just don't let it consume you and it's all good, right?"

"Yeah. Right."

"I gotta go for work, see you at night."

"See ya."

Listen, anyone who knew Bokuto Koutarou in even the most superficial of levels would tell you that he didn't like lying, which is why he was so credible in the face. So please believe him when he says that deceiving Konoha hadn't left him with any sense of satisfaction. 

The device lay inside his underwear drawer, under all the cloth. It would remain there whenever Konoha was home. But his friend had just left.

  
  


**_How did you get caught?_ **

_ -Good question… _

  
  


Koutarou must've seen about twenty different Keijis. A sizable number of them had a different Koutarou in their lives, some of them had other partners all together. A good number were also small children of various ages. But the last one he visited… Oh, that had been most like the Keiji he had spent years of his life with.

This one owned a bookstore. It was very early in the morning in that universe and as soon as Koutarou found himself on the street, he saw an Akaashi Keiji struggling to use keys to open a bookstore right in front of his building. He caught a glimpse of Koutarou as he stepped inside, opening the door. It was with one small gesture that he waved at him and closed it, disappearing behind it. The interaction, so familiar to Koutarou, made his heart race, in a way only the love of his life knew how to make it race. 

He went inside just a few minutes after.

"Oh, welcome." Akaashi greeted after the bell rang. "I wasn't expecting any customers this early, I'm sorry, I still have to arrange a few things."

That face… Akaashi hadn't been smiling but it was clear that he was happy, anyhow. He had been humming before Koutarou came in and interrupted with the chiming, his eyes glittering at the scene Akaashi got to see everyday, a scene he deeply loved - the numerous shelves of books waiting to be picked up and read. Koutarou felt a lump form in his throat but he found a way to respond anyhow.

"It's-" He gulped. "Sorry, it's okay. I- I can wait outside if you'd like-"

"Could you? It's only for a few minutes."

Koutarou couldn’t help the smile that grew on his face. "I don't mind it at all."

It turned soured as he waited by the steps. Yet there was no part of him that wanted to turn around and leave Akaashi to wonder where the strangely eager potential customer had gone, never to be seen again.

A few minutes later, Koutarou didn’t keep count of how many, Akaashi invited him back inside. The place was small. Koutarou wasn't too keen on reading in general but he felt a warm feeling flooding his chest due to how… Akaashi-like the space was. The walls of light colored wood, the shelves in matte black and white, elegant swirling handles on the stairs to the second floor, all of it a culmination of Akaashi Keiji and his decor taste. 

"This place is beautiful!" He commented, eying the shelves. 

"Why, thank you." 

"Uh, how long have you had this place for?"

"It's been four years as of last week." Akaashi got behind the counter. "Do you really like it?"

"Yes!" Koutarou jumped up. "It feels so comfy."

"Ah…" The owner blushed, turning his face away. "Thank you."

"You're welcome! Mind if I just browse for a while?"

Akaashi giggled. "Sure, go ahead. Love that you felt like you had to ask."

Koutarou bowed back, one of his arms at his waist. "I wanted to be polite. Thank you!"

And so he does end up just browsing around, looking at the books Akaashi has to sell. Of course not all of them were to the man's taste but Koutarou could pick those out himself anyway. He chose one on Art History to read, a subject Keiji had tried many many times to get him interested in. 

By the front window, he found a cushioned chair and took a seat. He reads for a long time, enough to see the colors of the sky changing outside. 

"Hello." Akaashi appeared in his field of vision at some point. "I'm really sorry but I'll be closing up soon, I-"

"Oh!" Koutarou shot up, standing straight. "Not at all. I'll be going now. It was… uh, really nice to see a new bookstore."

"It's not new, really."

"I mean for me! I hadn't seen it before."

"Ah, makes sense. Well, I'm glad you liked it so much. You're welcome to come back any time."

"Ka-" Koutarou coughed out, remembering Akaashi had never told his name as he sniffed with teary eyes. "That's so nice!!"

"It's nothing. Thank you for visiting."

"Always!"

Right then it was like his feet had grown roots under the ground of the store. Koutarou felt like if he were to leave, yet another part of his body would be ripped away from him. Akaashi was right there! The joke grew crueler and crueler, having the time of his life at the expense of Koutarou's misery… which, at this point, he had brought upon himself. 

"I-" He faced the man, blinking more than necessary to keep his eyes from watering again. "I'll see you around."

And he left, without waiting for a response.

The minute he was back in his apartment, his hands were handcuffed. Koutarou noticed the feds in his living room only a second after he had already been surrounded by them. 

"Bokuto Koutarou, you are under arrest due to the possession of illegal tech."

  
  


_ -Can you be the one to tell me that cause I genuinely don't know. _

**_We received a call from your neighbor._ **

_ -Ha… Of course. _

**_You've been sentenced to a year in prison._ **

_ -Hm, seems fair. _

**_But someone payed your bail._ **

_ -WHAT?! Who? _

**_A man called Konoha Akinori._ **

_ -(long pause) Oh. _

**_You are free to leave._ **

  
  


Koutarou stared at the man in the white suit. Did Konoha bail him out while the interrogation was still happening? Otherwise they wouldn't have started it at all, would it? And if that was indeed the case… his friend would be waiting for him outside, having been caught up on what Koutarou’s crime was. That thought made Koutarou grumble and wince as he walked towards the door.

His friend met him, arms crossed over his arms, sitting at a bench as he stared at the door of the police department with a burning fury. It only grew when his eyes found Koutarou on his way out.

"Konoha-"

His friend put his hands on his legs to push himself upward. "Shut up and get in the car." 

Koutarou's breath hitched in his throat but he nodded, head hung low as he made his way to the passenger seat of the car across the street. The drive was done in utter silence. A kind of quiet that screamed because there was so much left unsaid that would just be brought up to the surface later. And Koutarou knew that he would deserve every bit that would be thrown at him.

When Konoha got out of the car, he still refused to utter a word. He made his way towards the elevator on his own, confident that Koutarou was following because he knew the man wasn't insane enough not to.

The lecture started after the front door closed.

"Ko-"

"Are you crazy, Bokuto?"

He didn't reply.

"Answer me. Are you crazy? Because I can't think of any other reason why you would do what you did. It's like you went out of your way to destroy yourself!"

"Konoha, I'm sorry that I lied, I-"

"GOOD!" Konoha yelled, stepping closer. "I care that you lied to me, I care that you look me in the eye every day and pretend like you weren't actively harming your mental health and I care that you didn't come talk to me! Akaashi was also my friend. Do you think I haven't been hurt by any of it? And- And even if I wasn't, I'm supposed to be your friend! I'm supposed to be there to help you but you wouldn't even let me! God, Bokuto! Was there a worse way you could have dealt with this?!"

Koutarou squinted his eyes. "I'm- I'm so sorry."

It made Konoha huff, holding his head by the forehead. "I know you are. And- so I am because I should've never given you that jumper. But right now, I don't- I just don't care. And I need to be alone so," He turned around, walking towards the hall, "Excuse me."

He had half expected there to be a door slamming shut but there’s only a gentle click. But it resounds just the same, hauntingly and loud in Koutarou’s mind. And there’s not much else for him to do other than slide his feet to his room and drop on his bed, allowing the overwhelming guilt to take him into despair.

When he woke up the next day, Koutarou took notice on his nightstand clock that it was five in the afternoon. He couldn’t recall when he fell deep into sleep but his eyes stung when he tried to open them while his head throbbed in pain, which were good indicators, more or less. But it’s not like he wanted to leave his bedroom. At least not until he heard the front door opening.

Throwing the blanket off himself, Koutarou ran out and met Konoha, who sat at the couch, eying the hall as if he had been waiting for him to show up. A passing thought occurred to him then, what would happen if he wasn’t the first one to reach out after everything? He was in no position to even find out.

“Konoha…” he began, eying the couch and shaking his head before turning his attention to his friend again, “What can I do to make things better? W- Wait, did you sleep at all?”

Konoha’s eyes were bloodshot with dark bags under them to compliment it all. And that’s when Koutarou vaguely remembered seeing them there as well just the day before, it made him question for just how long they had been there.

“No.” Konoha answered, voice low and raspy, cracking at the end. “I didn’t. Kinda looks like you didn’t either.” Koutarou only nodded, letting silence break up the conversation. It took another moment but his friend spoke again. “To answer your question, just… give me space. And get to therapy, for fuck’s sake.”

“I… I’ll start looking today.”

“Yeah…” Konoha pushed himself up with the arm of the couch and walked past Koutarou to get to his room as he said, avoiding his eyes, “Good night, Bokuto.”

  
  


**You might be the first patient I’ve had that wanted to record our sessions.**

- _ Hm, I just want to hold myself to what I say here. _

**Okay… now, does that have to do with why you came for therapy?**

_ -Yeah, in part. I lied to a friend and it kinda broke our friendship so, I don’t wanna do that anymore. _

**I see. What did you lie to them for?**

_ -(clears throat) My boyfriend died a few months back. We had been talking about moving in together, he was looking for apartments, anyway- when he died, it felt like I went with him. It… It kinda of still does. (a gulp and pause) So my friend gave me a jumper, he had part in designing them… And he made me promise I would only use it once, so I could have some sort of... closure because Keiji died in a car crash and I never got to talk to him. But I just kept using it and told him it had broken and I had taken it out to the trash.  _

**That does sound heavy. How did your friend react?**

_ -He was angry, like he should be. And he asked for space, but he’s my roommate and I should move out soon… Problem is I lost my job. _

**And what did you do?**

_ -Emergency dispatcher. _

**(long pause) Perhaps you should consider a new line of work.**

-You think?! (pause) Sorry. I know. I applied for a temporary job at a fast food restaurant, see if I and just get enough money to move out then… maybe go to uni? I mean… I only graduated high school. 

**It sounds like a good plan, Koutarou. What would you like to do moving forward?**

_ -(breathing in) I don’t know. I still feel empty. I’ve been researching but nothing really interests me. _

**Well then, why did you become an emergency dispatcher in the first place?**

_ -I just wanted to help people. _

**I’m sure you know, but you can do that in many other jobs. Social work, for example. Or with a psychology degree.**

_ -I know. _

**You’re crying now, Koutarou.**

_ -(sniffing) I know. _

**Would you like to talk about why?**

_ -(gulping and sniffing) Keiji used to say he loved how much I wanted to help people. I couldn’t help him. _

**You blame yourself for his death? Koutarou, from what you’ve told me, there was nothing you could’ve done.**

_ -I KNOW BUT I HATE IT! (pause) I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! He was on an ambulance I didn’t send over there, probably called by someone who took too long to get on the damn phone and he was dead before he even got to the hospital and I- (more gulping) It feels like I failed him somehow.  _

**I understand that. But, you had no control over that situation, in any way. If you keep on blaming yourself for it, you will never be able to move forward. It is good that you were making plans, but following through is something different, something harder. So how about we work on that, huh?**

_ -(long pause) Yeah… I want that. _

  
  


It is a couple of months after moving out when Koutarou sees Konoha again. The scene is in spring, the height of beauty in nature, and they see each other at a park. Konoha spotted him first, going to him first. Koutarou’s eyes widened when his former roommate tapped him on the shoulder from behind the bench he sat on, taking a seat at his left side.

“You look better.” He commented, staring ahead at the tree in the center of the environment. 

Koutarou turned towards him, his profile showing a calm, peaceful expression. “You do too.”

“How’s been therapy?”

It took him a while to answer. “Surprisingly difficult but nothing I can’t handle.” He had the hint of a grin on his lips as he ended the sentence.

Konoha took notice and mirrored it. “That’s good.” He proceeded to breathe in and let his head fall back. “Mine’s been about the same.”

“When-”

“A bit after I got the news. You know, right around the time when you should’ve started too.”

Koutarou hissed with a few nods, and stretched a finger on his right hand to emphasize the word, “Deserved.”

“Of course it is.” Konoha stood up then and looked at his former friend. “The gang from high school is getting together for drinks on Friday, you know? Are you going?”

“Yeah!!” Koutarou followed suit. “Of course I am, I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I… I haven’t talked to those guys in a while.”

Konoha snorted, patting him on the back. “You’ll get the chance to explain as much as you want to while we’re all black out drunk. I gotta run now, my break’s almost done. I’ll see you around, Bokuto.”

“Yeah.” Koutarou opened up a smile while he watched the man wave his way out of the conversation. “See ya.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading and pls leave a comment <3


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